Bon Jovi: Bon Jovi-Cation Part 2 SHAROOOOON

Day 2.

View from our hotel balcony

St Patrick's Day in one of the most *cough cough cough sarcasm alert cough cough cough* Irish cities outside of Dublin herself. San Antonio, Texas. Where the O'toole's, the Murphy's and the Kelly's happily co-mingle with the Rodriguez's, the Jimenez's and the Rodriguez's.

An Irish Pub in San Antonio on
St Patty's day

We headed across the street to the Irish coffee shop, O'Starbucks.

After procuring beverages of the caffeinated kind, we headed down the stairs to along the Riverwalk towards our final destination.

The Alamo.

The sight of one of the bloodiest battles ever fought in Texas History.

The Alamo.

Where people say names like Sam Houston and Davey Crockett, with as much reverence as every other non Texan, American says George Washington or Abe Lincoln.

Ok, when they mentioned Davey Crockett I started singing the theme from the old Disney show. Under my breath, so not to offend the Texans that had come out.

Then I started singing the really offensive song, Crazy Train, by Ozzy Osbourne.

If you don't know, in 1983 Ozzy was still very drunk all the time. He performed a show on his tour in San Antonio and after the show he went to a bar. After several drinks he decided it was time to head back to his hotel. He stumbled along and realized he had to pee. So he was standing by this old building and he figured, what the hell, this is as good as any other sodding building. So he relieved himself…..ON THE ALAMO. Ozzy was arrested and banned from the city of San Antonio until the early part of this century.

However, since it was St Patrick's Day they honored the Irish at the Alamo. It was like Memorial Day for the Irish American Community.

There were bag pipers; they played Amazing Grace and God Blessed Texas by Little Texas. Ok, so they didn't play the second one.

We wandered around the Alamo, I realized I had to pee. Do I Ozzy it up and cop a squat and pee on this "Fortress Shrine, Cradle of Texas Liberty"? While the thought appealed to me, the fact that there were children around made me rethink my decision, not only would I get charged with public urination but probably exposing myself to a minor which is one of those things that you end up on a sex offenders list.

Ugh, not worth it.

Oh and I would miss the Bon Jovi concert.

Common Sense you win another round.

So I instead walked to the Riverwalk Mall with Lauri & Stacey and used the facilities there.

Oh I met one of 2 future husbands on this trip. At Ripley's Believe it or Not, they have the world's tallest man. He makes me feel like a midget. (Insert a joke about public urinals and Richie Sambora here).

After the mall we headed back to our hotel with a stop at a quaint café on the river for lunch, some shrimp ceviche & nachos with guacamole. There were, count them, TWO mariachi bands in our café performing for tips. Neither knew any Bon Jovi. Yes I was going to get Mariachi Bon Jovi. Or die trying.

Back to the hotel we go for a little rest and then to get ready for the show.

We left the hotel around 5:45 ish (the gate out of the parking garage of the hotel didn't want to let us out). Getting through down town San Antonio at 5 PM is like a bunch of 50 something's in a Vera Bradley store where everything is on sale. No one moves.

Luckily time, patience and gun control were on our side. We made it to the Fan Club tent with minutes to spare. We got our tickets and we could head into the arena. Just like everywhere else there were Bon Jovi loves San Antonio. Bon Jovi loves San Antonio so much they haven't been there in 20 years.

My seats were on Dave's side. I've never really sat on his side before. Maybe in 2001 in Giants Stadium, but that would be it.

Saw Ryan Star, he was good. More on him later. Finally Bon Jovi hits the stage. The crowd was loud and enthusiastic. The band was loud. The set was short. When they played wanted and then Prayer started I looked at my phone it was like 10:20. About a 2 hour show. All I could think was Vegas better be better than this. However, I heard Thorn in my Side, which I hadn't heard live before.

After the show we wanted post show food and the closest fast food place was Jack in the Box. Or as I shall call it, Crack in the Box, because there were so many crack dealers and crack whores around that place…

It started when I pulled the car up. Yes I was driving Stacey's big white SUV. And some woman, was it a woman? She comes up to Stacey and tells gets in her face as she's about to get out of the car and tells her to give her the money. This woman is angry (not Stacey, Stacey is calm) the woman is screaming how she was told the white truck would have her money. All I want to do is get back in the car and haul ass away from here.

Oh, did I mention San Antonio has super aggressive panhandlers? Well now, you know. It wasn't just this woman, but every random homeless person.

Finally angry crack whore walked away, we went into Jack in the Box. Waited for a while because you know the midnight shift at a fast food place is always the A team (not the A Team like Mr T but the A team like the sarcastic A Team). Finally every time we ordered something they didn't have it. I didn't want a hamburger at midnight, but it's what I got because that's what they had.

We left headed back to the hotel, yes I found it again.

Head up into the parking garage made for the Model T not for the Tahoe. I end up letting Lauri make the U turn because there's no parking let above floor #2. Awesome.

Back in the room, last minute packing stuff. I'm the first one to sleep around 1:30.